🌟 Discover Footprints Baby Loss Support 🌟
We’re honoured to feature Footprints Baby Loss Support on our blog. Founded by Sharon and Suzie, both of whom have tragically lost their twin boys, Footprints is dedicated to supporting families facing the unimaginable loss of one or more twins or triplets. Their heartfelt mission is to provide a compassionate community where parents, siblings, and grandparents can find solace and support.
From peer support to educational resources, Footprints is making a significant impact on those who need it most. We had the privilege of sitting down with them to learn more about their journey and the vital work they do.
🌐 Visit Footprints Baby Loss Support: https://www.footprintsbabyloss.org
Can you share the story behind the founding of your organisation and what inspired you to create it?
We have both experienced the death of both of our twin boys. Sharon’s twins Charlie and Joshua were born 25 years ago and Daniel and Rory, Suzie’s twin boys would be 12. We became friends after Sharon supported Suzie as her befriender. We have both been offering support to families who have experienced twin and triplet loss for many years and feel privileged to do so. We love talking to families about their babies and helping where we can at such an awful time.
We decided to found our charity last year and we launched in January 2024. We have had such amazing support from our community, other charities and health care professionals. We are passionate about providing as much support as we can to anyone who experiences the loss of a baby from a multiple birth.
Can you share the meaning of ‘Footprints’ Baby Loss?
When Sharon and I decided to create a new peer to peer support bereavement charity for those affected by the death of twins or triplets, finding the right name was our initial hurdle. We spent a long time trying to come up with a name that would resonate with anyone who has experienced the loss of a baby. Finding a name that was fitting, that we both liked and that was available in terms of domain names, meant that we could not go with a few of our initial ideas. ‘Footprints’ then emerged as the clear winner, capturing the essence of our mission and the lasting impact of our babies.
The meaning of ‘Footprints’ baby loss
Footprints felt like a really meaningful name. It is something that a lot of people associate with their baby loss no matter what stage the baby loss has happened. We often think or talk about the imprint a baby has left on our heart even if they are not here with us. If the death of a baby or babies is at a slightly later gestation or neonatal, then it is common for footprints to be taken of the baby or babies that have died. These are so special in the baby loss community.
Remembering our twins after they passed away
From the very start, we had the idea to somehow include our own twins’ footprints in the logo. Both Sharon and I found a footprint from each of our twins; Charlie and Joshua & Rory and Daniel. With the help of technology and a creative touch from Sharon’s daughter, Jess, we brought these footprints together.
Footprint Baby Loss: more than just a design
Kindly, a friend of ours, Paul Britton, who owns and runs his design business, Origin, offered to help us create a logo for Footprints. Paul was sensitive to our request about exploring the possibility of including these two sets of footprints and came up with some lovely designs. It stands at the heart of our twin and triplet baby loss charity, representing our dedication to providing peer-to-peer support for families grappling with the death of a baby from a multiple birth.
Luckily Sharon and I both loved the same design and the fact that the logo could include a footprint from each of our four twins that died. It felt so incredibly special and meaningful as those boys are the reason Sharon and I are on this journey. It feels right that they are at the very core of this charity… representing all the other babies gone too soon.
By sharing the story of our logo, we invite you to join us in our mission to support families affected by the loss of twins, triplets, or any baby. ‘Footprints’ is not just our name; it’s a reminder of the small yet profound impacts our babies have on our lives and the world.
What are the core missions and goals of your organisation in supporting bereaved families?
Our Vision
Footprints Baby Loss aims to provide support and guidance to families who experience the death of one or more of their twins or triplets before, during or after birth, and to help to educate and train Health Care professionals looking after these parents, promoting good standards of bereavement care. We understand the value of having a safe space to be able to communicate with someone who has been through something similar, and aim to provide a kind, caring and inclusive approach with our bereavement services. Our support is provided by those who have had first hand experience of twin or triplet loss.
Aims
- provide support to bereaved parents and families of twins, triplets and higher order multiples through befriending, online support groups, social media, literature and education;
- facilitate networks of peer-to-peer community support;
- provide education and support, specific to twins, triplets and higher order multiples, to healthcare professionals, employers and carers of bereaved parents and families;
- promote best practice in high quality care during and after pregnancy for twins, triplets and higher order multiples;
- collaborate with other charities to raise awareness and promotion of high-quality bereavement support;
We are a charity run by bereaved parents for bereaved parents.
‘I like your focus on bereaved parents being at the heart of what you offer when they sadly experience the death of a twin or triplet.’ Jenni Thomas OBE Founder of CBUK
Values
At Footprints Baby Loss we –
- Are passionate about supporting families that experience the death of their twins or triplets, and have deep empathy due to our lived experience.
- Offer a sense of community and provide a safe space where we are united in our grief, at any time in your journey.
- Will ensure that our charity is providing a welcoming support service that is accessible to everyone, and fully inclusive regardless of different personal experiences as well as social and cultural differences.
- Respect each other at all times even though we all grieve in different ways.
Could you highlight some of the most impactful programs and services you offer to families experiencing baby loss?
First-hand experience
Our support is provided by those who have had first-hand experience of twin or triplet loss. We understand the value of having a safe space to be able to communicate with someone who has been through something similar, and provide a kind, caring and inclusive approach with our bereavement services.
Befriending
Befriending is peer-to-peer support from someone who has experienced a similar twin or triplet loss to you. All of our befrienders are volunteers and at least a year on from their own loss. They offer a caring, empathetic and understanding listening ear. We try to match people according to their experience where we can. Befriending can be by
phone, email, messages or video calls. Our befrienders all go through an induction process and have continuous training and self reflection and are well supported.
Online Support Groups
Our online support group meetings are held virtually on Google Meet. There is usually a group of around five to ten people at each meeting and they will be hosted by experienced befrienders. Our meetings provide a welcoming space with other parents who understand. Everyone is different and we completely understand if you wish to just listen or if you want to talk. There is no expectation of how much or how little you must share. It is fine to cry and we do sometimes manage to have a little laugh too.
Online Community – private Facebook group
We provide a safe and caring space for our bereaved community to come together to share experiences and photographs (where they want to) with each other. It is a place where you can ask questions, say your baby or babies names with people that understand.
Resources
We have a variety of twin and triplet loss specific leaflets that can all be found on our website. We also have some new stickers for Maternity Notes or the surviving twin/ triplet/s or siblings Red Book.
Personal experiences – we have lots of personal stories on our website which can be really helpful for our community to read. It can feel very lonely and isolating after twin or triplet loss so we hope the blogs help people to feel less alone.
What specific support do you provide for siblings, grandparents, dads, and the extended family who are also affected by the loss?
We are currently (Aug 24) developing our website to include some new support pages specifically for dads, siblings, surviving twins or triplets, parents that experience TFMR, Pregnancy after twin or triplet loss, neurodiversity and loss from a multiple birth, longer ago bereaved and triplets. We want everyone from a multiple birth pregnancy loss to feel part of our community. We have a new leaflet for family and friends, which is due to launch in September, to help them support bereaved twin and triplet loss parents. We have mum, dad and granny befrienders that can offer 1-1 peer support.
What have been some of your most significant achievements or milestones since the charity’s inception?
We have been so touched by the support from everyone since we launched our charity, especially from other baby loss charities and health care professionals. We have supported lots of families in our first six months and feel privileged to be able to talk to families about their babies. We have the most amazing volunteers and we are very thankful to them for everything they do for us. We feel proud of the community that we have at Footprints.
Our fundraising in our first six months has been phenomenal, raising over £20,000 so far! We are truly grateful for everyone who gets involved and fundraises or donates to our charity. We have enjoyed some really different events so far, including running, baking and dragon boat racing to name a few. The money raised makes so much difference to the support we can offer and means we can continue to make new resources and support more people.
We are looking forward to our first ever Footprints Remembering Day at the start of BLAW on 6th October and also have an event planned with Aching Arms for surviving twins/ triplets and siblings in September.
We are proud to have partnered with The Skye High Foundation, Loss Books and TAPS Support and to be working closely with our medical advisors Dr Nicholas Embleton, Samantha Collinge and Dr Angelo Cavallaro.
How do you ensure that your support services are accessible and effective for all bereaved parents?
We offer different types of support to allow as many people as possible to access it. We have a flexible approach as we know that grief affects people differently. Our support is often tailored to what the person or family needs.
We uphold the principle that every individual deserves respect and dignity. Our mission is to provide unwavering support to all members of our twin baby loss and triplet loss community. We embrace diversity across all spectrums, including gender, race, culture, age, disability, sexual orientation, social class, religion, identity, and belief. Our goal is to make everyone involved with Footprints feel welcomed, respected, and at ease.
What are your future plans and visions for the charity over the next five years?
We have so many plans! We want to do more training with Health Care Professionals. We will be writing more twin and triplet specific resources. We want to offer regular online group meetings for specific groups such as dads, TFMR, PAL. We want to continue our collaborative work with other charities and organisations, holding joint events and writing resources together. Most of all we want to reach as many people who need our support as possible.
How can individuals and communities get involved in supporting your charity and its mission?
Follow us on our social media pages and like and share our content.
Instagram – @footprintsbabyloss
Twitter – @footprintsbl
Facebook – Footprints Baby Loss Support
LinkedIn – Footprints Baby Loss
Volunteer for us if you have personal experience of twin or triplet loss. We have lots of different types of volunteering roles.
Donate or fundraise for us – Host your own event or join one of our fundraising events. You can also donate a regular or a one off amount via our website. We rely solely on donations at the moment.
Tell everyone about our charity and the support that we offer. We are trying to ensure that everyone who experiences the death of one or more of their twins or triplets knows about our support.
Can you share a particular story or testimonial from a family who has been positively impacted by your charity’s work?
Claire Muscott
Having spent my entire adult life battling unexplained infertility, in January 2023 at the age of 36 on my tenth (and ironically, final) ivf, I fell pregnant. I had been pregnant through ivf twice before, many years ago and many years apart, but suffered early losses. This made the wait between the positive test and our seven week scan an incredibly anxious time. That scan was to reveal that our last embryo had split into identical twins. My initial reaction was pure shock followed by fear – I knew identical twin pregnancies came with a lot of risks and selfishly, I just wanted a simple pregnancy and to deliver a healthy baby. These thoughts haunt me every day.
The professionals couldn’t find a membrane between them in the first few scans adding the extra worry that they were Momo twins. At 13 weeks they were diagnosed as modi and I felt like a weight had been lifted and the twins were safe now. At 17 weeks, twin two was significantly smaller and had SFGR so we were referred to fetal medicine where we had more detailed scans. It was there it was discovered the twins had developed spontaneous TAPS. At just over 19 weeks, I was rushed to Kings Hospital in London for emergency laser surgery to separate the blood vessels on my placenta which were connecting the twins. Both survived the surgery and both twins went from strength to strength over the next few weeks. We had clear fetal MRI scans and the growth difference between them levelled out too. It seemed like a miracle had occurred. (It might be worth mentioning here that after the laser surgery, at 23 weeks, we were offered a termination of either the entire pregnancy or of twin two due to the complexity of the pregnancy)
At 28 weeks, my waters broke with heavy bleeding – I spent 48 hours in the delivery ward but thankfully didn’t go into labour. I had a course of steroids and antibiotics, just in case. I then moved into a labour ward for close monitoring and despite the fluid and blood still leaking, both twins were absolutely fine and showed no signs of distress. Another miracle.
A week later, everything was back to normal, no more blood or fluid and I was ready to go home – but then came the scan that went through my heart like lightning, twin two’s heart had stopped. The shock was so severe, I couldn’t even cry straight away. In fact, I remember hearing the lady in the bay next door to me crying before I did. I kept thinking that once the fetal medicine team did a proper scan, they would see it had been a terrible mistake. But it hadn’t. After overcoming battle after battle, twin two had lost the war.
To add even more difficulty to this situation, we now had to make a decision whether to continue the pregnancy or deliver the twins while twin one was still alive and healthy. The hospital couldn’t offer any advice on this, all they could do was give us the facts – they don’t know why twin two had died so suddenly and they cannot guarantee the safety of twin one, yet delivering a baby at 29 weeks wasn’t ideal either.
Obviously, we were under significant pressure to make this decision, which was to deliver.
The next day, after 27 hours of constant monitoring, nil by mouth and on a magnesium drip, the twins were delivered via c section. Twin one, Florence, went straight to nicu (via a 10 second lay on my chest) weighing 2lb12 and twin two, Winnie was taken away by the bereavement team weighing 2lb1.
My grief for Winnie massively outweighed the joy of the birth of Florence. She was perfect, like she was sleeping and would wake up at any second. There was not one blemish on her little body. We got to choose some clothes for her, hold her and I kept her in the room with me overnight where I just held her hand and stared at her. The help and support on offer from the hospital and various loss charities was incredible.
The next few months were gruelling. I struggled to bond with Florence, for fear of something happening to her and the fact she was in the nicu and I couldn’t Mother her. I also felt that Winnie needed me more than Florence who had nurses attending to her every need where Winnie had only me. The guilt I felt for wishing her away early in the pregnancy weighs heavy on my mind each and every day.
I love Florence more than I ever knew possible. I look at her and I think how amazing it would have been to have two of her. I think about the future and how she will feel when she learns about Winnie and I’m already mindful of not shadowing her special days with grief. It’s a minefield.
Finding a befriender through Footprints has been a breath of fresh air. Talking to someone who has been through something so niche and similar to me is invaluable as these emotions can only truly be understood by someone unfortunate enough to feel the same. I know I’ve got a long road ahead of me, infertility has taught me to be resilient, realistic and made me tougher than I needed to be so I often find my grief suppressed. Writing this blog has brought a lot to the surface but it’s also made me remember Winnie so vividly for which I am grateful.
‘Our fundraising bake sale has been one of the highlights of our year. We were able to raise much needed funds for Footprints and honour our Daughter Winnie simultaneously. Our village, family and friends really got behind us and the day had a real wholesome feel. We are so pleased we decided to do it!’
Claire, mum of Florence and Winnie, who raised an incredible £1500 for us by holding a bake sale for our June Baking for Babies fundraising event.
‘Losing one of our twin girls exposed us to an extremely complex set of emotions. We tried different support networks but found it difficult to be truly honest. Since I was matched by Footprints with my befriender, I have been able to talk to someone who has been through a very similar experience and has a genuine understanding of what we have been through. Nothing I say to her makes me feel silly, angry or stupid and it’s really helped me to navigate life in a more positive way.’
Claire, mum of Florence and Winnie
Talking about speaking to her befriender
We are truly grateful to have had the opportunity to feature Footprints Baby Loss Support on our blog. Sharon and Suzie’s strength and dedication in turning their personal tragedies into a source of comfort for others is both inspiring and heartwarming. Their work provides a lifeline to families navigating the unimaginable loss of one or more twins or triplets.
At CuddleCot, we deeply admire their mission and commitment to creating a compassionate space where families can find the support they need. Thank you, Footprints, for all that you do and for allowing us to share your incredible story.